By Jamie Kravitz July 19, Personally, when someone tells me they're still friendly with their ex, I can't help but be a little skeptical.
QuaVaundra Perry, a d psychologist specializing in relationship distress. Just remember that you two have some navigating to do, too, in figuring out what your life together will look like in this blended family.
Dear Therapist is for informational purposes only, does not constitute medical advice, and is not a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. On the days that Adam has the kids, are you there, too, or does Adam spend that time alone with boyfrienc
Once you know the answers, you can better assess how to deal with the situation. Once you are ready to bring it up, calmly present your concerns and watch how your partner responds. How does your partner respond when textx bring up your feelings about the situation? Boygriend suggests you observe their communication pattern over a period of time, so that you can have examples to present to your partner, rather than just one incident.
Also, if your partner's ex calls or texts at odd hours or makes inappropriate remarks on social media, these are likely s of disrespect toward the his. This article was originally published on July 19, Perhaps they're text genuinely interested in maintaining a friendship with a person who was once very important to them. Hopefully, Adam will be willing to get some professional help in navigating his co-parenting situation, even if his ex-wife declines to participate with him. Therefore, it's difficult for me to understand how you can be just friends boyfriend someone whom you were once romantically involved with.
Shutterstock Because exes are understandably a very touchy subject, it can be a difficult topic to approach.
What to do when your boyfriend still talks to his ex
How often is your partner communicating with his or her ex? But others will require you both to talk about your expectations in this relationship. I know not all breakups are dramatic, Bachelor-worthy blowups complete with screaming and crying, but they still ify the end of a relationship. Just because your partner ky in contact with their ex, that doesn't necessarily mean they still have feelings for the ex, or that they are being at all unfaithful.
Parenting requires a lot of selflessness but also has many rewards. Before you question your S.
Do you feel secure in your relationship? More like this. There are effective and ineffective ways to have that discussion, although the way your partner initially reacts could tell you everything you need to know about who they are.
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It was updated on Feb. In her experience, most healthy relationships with exes involve brief, infrequent messages or phone calls. Especially in a new relationship, you want to be careful not to make unfounded accusations or appear unnecessarily jealous. Of course, this could just be a case of a bitter ex, and may not actually have anything to do with your partner's current behavior.
Do you have a tendency to be jealous in relationships?
If your partner seems defensive or dismissive of your concerns, that is likely a red flag that their relationship [with their ex] is a lot closer than you suspect," says Dr. What are the specific behaviors on your partner's end that are making you feel uncomfortable?
Ask a guy: when he’s still in touch with his ex
You can look out for red flags that something secretive is going on, but if it's a simple happy birthday text or a friendly Instagram comment every so often, you probably have nothing to worry about. But this would take time, involve conflict, and also mean that the kids would be more of a presence in your life—which brings me back to the package deal I mentioned earlier. Before you approach your partner, you may want to think about fexts your suspicions are warranted. How well do you know them?
She explains that if your relationship with your partner is already on shaky text, it may not withstand his partner talking to their ex —or you talking to your ex, for that matter. If you're concerned about your ificant other's relationship with their ex, you're totally justified in starting a respectful conversation about it. If you can begin to really accept and ultimately boyfriend the reality that his kids come first without taking it personally, then you and Adam can sit down and figure out what can be done to improve the situation with their mother.
Always seek the advice of your physician, mental-health professional, or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Shutterstock Determining whether the communication between your partner and their ex is healthy depends on important factors, such as how strong the current relationship is between you and your partnerhow long it's been since the relationship ended between your partner and their exand if there are any residual emotions on your partner's part or on their ex's.
My boyfriend has been secretly texting his ex since the pandemic started. he says it’s harmless. do i believe him?
He comes with his children, and his children come with their mother. It sounds like Adam is trying to please everyone and ends up feeling trapped. Similarly, stepparenting requires a lot bohfriend selflessness and has the potential to come hjs rewards, but it also comes with a stipulation—one you have to decide whether you can live with. So, if your boyfriend or girlfriend still talks to their exI totally get why you might not be percent on board with it.
One option might be for Adam and his ex to see a therapist who can help them navigate their co-parenting arrangement, creating parameters and offering tools for handling the kids when his ex is alone with them. If you feel weird about the fact that your partner still talks to their ex, that's boyfirend valid.
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You don't want to come off as accusatory that won't help the conversation progress in a comfortable mannerso consider asking yourself the following questions before you sit down with your S. How much time have you spent with them? However, it is possible that your partner doesn't have any ulterior motives.